Philly Front Office

I hate the Chiefs. I hate everything about them. I hate their pitchman QB, I hate their entitled receivers, and, yes, I hate their coach. I am writing about how they put the team together with angry keystrokes and so much muttering that my wife asked me what’s wrong. They make my blood boil and the Eagles are going to rip them apart on Sunday.

Trade

There are only two trades of any distinction for the Chiefs. The first is for Deandre Hopkins. Hopkins came over from the Titans before the trade deadline for a 5th round pick. For their trouble, KC has an aging but still very good and reliable safety valve for Mahomes. I think we can expect an old on old during the Super Bowl with Darius Slay.

Mecole Hardman came via trade too after getting drafted by the Chiefs, going to the Jets in free agency, losing his job, pouting about it, and then demanding a trade back. That is not the second trade we are discussing.

Draft

The other trade was for Patrick Mahomes. In the biggest irony of ironies, the Buffalo Bills traded the #10 pick to the Chiefs in exchange for later picks and a future first. Don’t hold your breath, I’ll tell you… none of those picks ended up being as good as Patrick Mahomes. Now you can’t do anything without seeing his dumb hair trying to sell you something.

After Mahomes though, only WR1 Xavier Worthy, DE1 George Karlaftis, and CB1 Trent McDuffie are first round picks starting on this team. None of those guys went higher than #21.

The second round is where this team has really shined. DT1 Chris Jones is obviously the biggest steal of this group at #37 in 2016. There are starters and producers all over the field though including C Creed Humphrey, WR Skyy Moore, WR Rashee Rice (if you can call him shining), WR Hardman, LB Nick Bolton, and S Bryan Cook. Those 3 receivers will not be playing in this game due to injuries and one also being an a-hole (Rice).

Good teams need bargains though and the Chiefs have had success later in the draft as well. RB2 Isiah Pacheco came in the 7th round, DE2 Mike Danna in the 5th, RG Trey Smith in the 6th, LB2 Leo Chenal in the 3rd, and CB2 Jaylen Watson in the 7th. It should be noted that the Chiefs are going to be putting a 3rd year 7th rounder on DeVonta Smith.

I wish I didn’t hate Travis Kelce so much. I didn’t want to initially. He was a 3rd round pick back in the Lane Johnson draft and is obviously Jason Kelce’s brother. Both brothers have become completely oversaturated. I’ll never hate Jason, but Travis is fair game. Now we have him saying it’s an Honor to play in front of Trump who just happens to hate his girlfriend. Is it too much to ask for Philly’s own (kinda) Taylor Swift to make Travis’s life a living hell this week and break up with him right before the game? Isn’t that much more productive than the “will he propose after the threepeat” bullshit? God, I hate them.

Free Agency

The Chiefs have relied on free agency to fill their roster holes much more than the Eagles. Only 1 offensive and 2 defensive starters for the Birds were not either drafted or traded for. The Chiefs have 8.

Ever since they jettisoned Tyreek Hill, KC has been lacking a true #1 wide receiver. It obviously hasn’t hurt them any, but they have had to cobble together another group of pass catchers this year led by Hollywood Brown and JuJu Smith-Schuster. Both washed out of their previous situations.

The offensive line especially has been a regular trouble spot in keeping and developing talent. LT Joe Thuney came over from the Pats, RT Jawaan Taylor from the Jags, and RG Mike Caliendo is an undrafted free agent who is also considered the weakest link on the line. He will be going up against destroyer-of-worlds Jalen Carter Sunday.

On defense, DT2 Tershawn Wharton went undrafted and benefits greatly from his all pro linemate Jones. LB3 Drue Tranquill came over from the Chargers and Justin Reid from the Texans, all on modest deals.

Finally, their special teams unit is completely undrafted. Well Matt Araiza was drafted but then got accused of sexual assault and cut by Buffalo before he even signed his contract. Harrison Butker manages to occasionally kick when he’s not giving lectures about how Men are from Mars and women should never be allowed to see the sky. I don’t know Nikko Remigio, but Sydney Brown will definitely make orphans of his children if he decides to return a ball.

Am I biased against the Chiefs? Absolutely. So is everyone else. Well except the officials…

GO BIRDS!!!