Philly Front Office

Looks like the Tush Push is getting banned today. The NFL’s owners are meeting in Minneapolis and will vote on whether the Eagles’ signature play gets the axe. If 24 out of 32 owners vote in the affirmative, we have to take the play out of the playbook. This rule change was brought by the Green Bay Packers and has the backing of the NFL Commissioner.

Our first reaction is, very obviously, fuck the Packers and anyone else who votes for this. The reasoning behind the ban is apparently player safety. However, like so many things nowadays, this is not backed by any proof at all.¹ No statistics or testimony would lead anyone to believe that players are in any more danger running this particular play than any other. It is objectively nonsense. If you can’t back up your opinion with facts, you are simply trying to get your way on something you don’t like.

Our second reaction is, well fuck everyone, we’ll just win anyway. And we will. The Tush Push accounts for a very minimal percentage of the Eagles’ plays in a game. It isn’t that much more effective than a regular quarterback sneak if at all. Anyone who watched the games knows that the NFL was itching to penalize us on the play all year. Routinely the other team would line up offsides, but the Eagles would be the ones getting called for some kind of violation. Outside of the NFC Championship game where Washington made such a mockery of it through their ineptitude, it was always the Eagles under the microscope on the play. We will be fine gaining one yard with the best offensive line and strongest QB in the league. This misses the point though.

The Eagles don’t run the tush push to gain a yard. The Eagles run the Tush Push to physically and mentally dominate their opponent. It is a play so well run that it is driving the rest of the league crazy. Frankie Luvu just about lost his damn mind in the aforementioned NFC Championship Game. It is completely demoralizing for an opponent to deal with the Eagles confidence on the play. Sure other teams might sneak and go for it, but the Eagles will go for it without hesitation. This confidence is what the league is legislating out of existence.

So, our third reaction is why are you always fucking with us? We know why they want to remove the play, but why are we the ones who always have to be on the defensive? The answer is that we are the villains. We are who other teams and their fans look at and tell themselves they are better than, facts be damned. We have the mantra of no one likes us, we don’t care, but we absolutely care. No one is as easily baited into an argument defending our team as we are and I can prove it.

Nick Sirianni just received a contract extension. Immediately talking heads and faceless internet trolls rushed to condemn the signing. He is overrated, he has a super team, he doesn’t actually do anything, this list goes on. You’re mad just reading this right now aren’t you? We rush to defend him. Why? There is no need! Nick Sirianni has been to two Super Bowls and won one in 4 years of never missing the playoffs. His legacy is ALREADY secured. No amount of resume broadcasting is going to change anyone’s mind on this because they simply don’t like him. Again, there are no FACTS that can be shown to knock Sirianni down. None. Still, they try. Still we defend.

The same goes for Jalen Hurts. By every measure he is already an ALL-TIME QB in this league. Super Bowl MVP is something no one can take away. When people are arguing that he is a game manager or a TD vulture that can’t throw, they are really just arguing about style points. He has shown time and again (including twice in the Super Bowl) that he can make every throw if he has to. So, when he hands the ball off to literally the best running back in the NFL, it is somehow his fault that he didn’t throw it? This is again nonsense. For anyone else in sports and in life, if someone didn’t use the right tool for something, you would chastise them. Ben Simmons was really good at passing, does that mean we should be happy he didn’t dunk on Trae Young? That’s an exaggeration, but used to prove the point. The Eagles and Jalen Hurts make the right decision damn near every game. Do you know how I know that? They fucking win! Whether it is passing or running, they do what they know the defense can’t stop. Is the argument that Hurts should throw the ball even when the other team cannot stop Saquon Barkley? Are you a fucking idiot?

See, I just got baited into my own argument all by myself. I care. Why is this? We as Eagles fans had to deal with the league spoon feeding its audience the Dallas Cowboys for decades. Dallas was always one of the most hated teams, but also the most well liked by the casual fan. They had the cheerleaders and the rings and they were associated with goddamn cowboys. It didn’t get easier than that. The league pushed them as the hero. As their top rival, naturally we were their villain. We hated that. Well, things have changed thanks to the Cowboys’ long running competitive drought. They are still the team for older casuals, but the new era needed a new hero. Enter the Chiefs. They were another team from the heartland that not only won, but won with flair and wholesome charm. They had characters like Mahomes and Andy Reid that appeal to shlocky advertisers, kids, and casuals. Hell, I have to yell at my kid to not throw the ball sidearm like Pat does. Throw in Taylor Swift, and this is the team with easily the most appeal. They are the main character. Sure, they have their detractors and have been overexposed in the media, but they are still the heroes the league wants. And again, they have their villain.

Why not us? That’s our real reaction. We have done everything right. We have the rings, the QB, the feel good stories, why aren’t we America’s team? Why are they trying to stop us? It almost feels like Will’s dad leaving him with Uncle Phil and Aunt Viv…how come he don’t want me man? They just don’t. The league and the rest of America have their favorites and it’s not us. We are forever trying to gain the approval of something that is never going to give it.

There is only one thing to do. Embrace the villainy. They don’t want us? Fuck them. Anyone going to the Packers game in November, be the biggest troll you can be. Yell “HE PUSHED ME” any time a Packers fan bumps into you. Be the biggest asshole possible. That’s all they want us to be anyway. You got it. We are always going to care, that isn’t going to change. All we can do is be us. The villains.

1. Hilariously the only people hurt on the play were NY Giants players who comically had no idea what they were doing ↩︎