Philly Front Office

[Updated because I am, in fact, dumb. The Eagles have their own PSL called an SBL. It costs $13k. It isn’t for all seats though, but many of them. I updated this post to make me sound…uh… less dumb? At least we don’t have to watch the Giants.]

I really wasn’t going to do this because it’s silly, but here I am giving oxygen to Kayvon Thibodeaux and his comments that Eagles fans are dumb. It’s that kind of blanket stupidity that revs people up into a frenzy in all walks of life, but it gives me the opportunity to point out one of the worst deals in sports: The NY Giants Season Ticket.

Getting season tickets in the NFL used to be a pretty cool thing. In some places, people would put their grandkids on a waiting list so when the name was finally called, the youngest generation could be the ones to get the longest use out of it. Sometimes it would take that long to actually get picked. No one wants to stupidly die while on the waiting list and have their family go to the back of the line!

Well, some teams saw this unbridled devotion not as endearing, but as a way to profit. Enter the New York Giants. Starting two years ahead of the opening of their crappy new stadium in 2010, the Giants started selling personal seat licenses (PSLs). For the low, low price of between $1,000 and $20,000 depending on how good the seat is, you could stand in that original line and have the opportunity to eventually pay for the seat itself. That’s right, you have to pay to have the ability to pay. If you were already a season ticket holder? Too bad, you had to pay for the PSL or lose your seat. If you had been in the waiting list line for 30 years? Too bad, you are out of luck.

The Giants claimed that the PSLs would fund the construction of the stadium itself (now 15 years old) but the program worked so well on their brilliant fans, that they decided to keep it going. To their credit, the Giants have not raised the price of PSLs since the beginning.

Now that you have your PSL, what’s next? Well now you need to buy those tickets silly! For another small, large fee you can actually attend the game (not parking though, that will cost several limbs). The cheapest ticket is $1000 for 9 games. Not terrible. For the best seats, that will set you back around $5,000. Of course, that isn’t including your PSL cost.

Do you know what is even better for die hards? You can sell your PSL like property, with the Giants approval of course. Gone are the days of waiting in that line. Why not pay a jacked-up resale price for that PSL instead! Wonderful. Of course, if enough Giants fans just give up on their putrid front office, that PSL will go back into the hopper for the Giants to sell again.

Full disclosure, the Eagles have something called a Stadium Builder License and it’s the same thing. It costs $13k, but it isn’t for all seats. You can still get your season tickets the old fashion way by joining 86,000 others and waiting 30 years, or buy your SBL on the secondary market. Eagles fans just don’t give up their tickets. For the Super Bowl champions, ticket packages can range from $1500 to $5000. Somehow, that isn’t much different from the bottom feeder Giants. Great value!

All in all, over the last 10 years, a Giants fan could have spent $70,000-ish to watch the Giants go 57-106-1. During that same time, the Eagles have gone 97-66 with 2 Super Bowl victories. Also, Eagles season ticket holders get first dibs for playoff games. I don’t know if this is the Giants policy considering the new stadium hasn’t hosted a playoff game (no home playoff games since 2008, a loss to the Eagles).

Just remember Kayvon, your genius Giants fans pay as much as $20,000 just to watch your sorry ass lose every week. Us dumb Eagles fans are forced to pay less to watch the Super Bowl Champions. You got us!