Philly Front Office

Who else stayed up into overtime with the feeling of dread weighing on them like a lead blanket, knowing that things would not be okay? Good, I knew I wasn’t the only one. Even when we got the free first down that never comes, it still didn’t seem right. Now the Eagles are in trouble. We are 8-5 while Dallas is 6-6-1. That’s a 1.5 game cushion. One more screw up, that’s all we have guaranteed for ourselves right now and then to pray we figure things out. There’s no point in predicting we will rebound or saying it’s over. We just have to watch the next few weeks play out and hope for the best. That’s about as solemn a segue I’m ever going to have…

Thursday Night Football

• Atlanta Falcons at Tampa Bay Buccaneers
  • I can’t stand this Falcons team. What are they? Heads need to absolutely roll in this front office in the offseason. They’ve been eliminated from the playoffs with 4 weeks to go AND don’t own their first-round pick. Generational incompetence has taken place these last few years. THAT BEING SAID, they have a chance to do the Carolina Panthers a huge favor by taking care of the Bucs before the weekend even begins.
  • The Bucs have lost 4 out of 5 and look completely lost. I for one say GREAT! I wish nothing but bad tidings on the city of Tampa for both sports and personal reasons. The Carolina Panthers rising this season to challenge the Bucs for the division is the division race none of us knew we needed.

Worst Front Office Series: Atlanta Falcons

1pm Games

• Cleveland Browns at Chicago Bears
  • Is there such thing as a perfect loss? Cleveland was defeated by the Titans who had a worse record, Shedeur Sanders looked good, the team got down late and did everything they could do to come back except win. FLAWLESS. Now they just can’t do anything stupid like take advantage of a Bears team looking past them on the road. Cleveland has the SOS tiebreaker over everyone but has one too many wins. They need to lose and watch.
  • The Bears almost did it. After kicking the Eagles butts, they lost late to the Packers. They also lost earlier to the Lions. They still have to play both again. Until they can beat their big brothers, they are not ready for primetime. They also now have a tie break advantage over the Eagles so we desperately need them to lose and then lose again.
• Baltimore Ravens at Cincinnati Bengals
  • This Ravens season seems cursed. Nothing is going right. Last week’s loss to the Steelers after the season long comeback they made just doesn’t make sense. It was also one of the games they couldn’t afford to lose with the Patriots, Packers, and the Steelers finale still to come.
  • The Bengals had the Bills and Joe Burrow threw the game away. I love Burrow, but that was awful. How come no one is calling to bench him for Joe Flacco? I don’t understand.
• Los Angeles Chargers at Kansas City Chiefs
  • I don’t think I’ve ever seen a winning team man handled to the extent the Eagles defended the Chargers last week. I know the Chargers’ line is banged up, but they had no answer for the pressure. Is that consolation? Not really. Herbert got destroyed and still won and thus received no criticism. Typical.
  • The Chargers can deliver the final knock out of the Chiefs this week. They are sitting at 6-7, 2 full games and a tiebreak out of the final playoff spot. I still hate them for Super Bowl 57, so I want them out, even if it means rooting for Justin Herbert. At least the Chargers having a good record makes the Eagles loss look better.
• Buffalo Bills at New England Patriots
  • It really was nice of Joe Burrow to give Josh Allen a free one last week. Not only did he get to face the Bengals defense, but Joe Burrow tossed him to free possessions. Anyway, the Bills are now 9-4 and a game up on the Texans and Colts (who are both looking up at the Jags) for the 6 and 7 seeds. I would really like them to miss the playoffs.
  • Unfortunately, that means we have to root for the Patriots. That is not going to be easy. They’re Boston. Am I allowed to do that? This is gross. Maybe I’ll root for Josh Allen just this once.
• Washington Commanders at New York Giants
  • TANK RANK GAME OF THE WEEK
  • The Commanders have lost 8 straight and probably shouldn’t risk their QB in this lost season. If they lose out, they are going to be firmly in the mix for the #1 pick. That can’t happen without losing to the Giants.
  • The Giants currently sit in the pole position for the top pick in the draft as they hold the tiebreaker with the other two 2-loss teams, the Raiders and Titans. HOWEVER, beating the Commanders drops them all the way down to #6. Do not underestimate the Giants ability to screw their own draft position. This one is tough, but lets go Giants to screw themselves. I somehow have more faith in them not screwing up the draft than Washington.
• New York Jets at Jacksonville Jaguars
  • The Jets have played so much better since they gave up on the season. It’s a shame. They really needed that #1 pick. They are the least talented team in the NFL, but would pick #7 if the season ended today. Unfortunately, all of that puts them in the perfect position to play spoiler for the suddenly leading their division Jags.
  • The Texans were supposed to win the AFC South. When they started bad, the Colts looked great. Now that some dust has cleared, it’s the Jags on top. Yes, the team that traded a future first round pick to move up to get a 2-way player who is playing ZERO ways right now and completely botched their offseason is now leading the division. The NFL is a weird place man. HOWEVER, I would like the Jets to screw themselves and the Texans to win the division, so let’s go for NY in only the most schadenfreudey way.
• Arizona Cardinals at Houston Texans
  • The Cardinals are very quietly losing their way into a good draft pick. Unfortunately, they lose every SOS tiebreaker to the 7 teams ahead of them except to the Titans. They are rooting for every bad team ahead of them to win. They are in this bad spot through basically no fault of their own, they just happen to share a division with the Rams, Seahawks, and 49ers.
  • Is anyone not rooting for the Texans? Their defense is like watching Mike Tyson in the late 80s. They are powerful, fast, and seem to relish in hurting their opponents. It’s AWESOME.
• Las Vegas Raiders at Philadelphia Eagles
  • The Raiders are starting old friend Kenny Pickett. Why? Why do they have to do that? The Eagles just need to beat up on a bad team to hopefully get themselves right. Buffalo does it. Dallas does it. KC did it earlier in the year. Why can’t the Eagles just have a normal game against a bad team at home. Nope, we get the possible Kenny Pickett revenge game instead.
  • This can’t happen, right? The Eagles defense should be able to make Kenny Pickett want to retire at halftime. If we sacked Justin Herbert 7 times, Pickett should basically be a turnover machine. The Eagles need to just let it all out this week. Be like Ilsa in her ice castle and sing your goddamn offensive pipes out guys. Nick Foles tossed 7 TDs against the Raiders all those years ago. This needs to be that level of domination, a cleanse of all the bullshit these last few weeks. Then get ready to do it again to the Commanders.

Eagles Postgame: Do You Really Want to Bench Jalen Hurts?

4pm Games

• Green Bay Packers at Denver Broncos
  • Game of the Week
  • The Packers looked dead in the water after losing to the Eagles but have since won 4 in a row and now stand just that tie away from being the #1 seed in the NFC. This fanbase was questioning the coach and the QB even before the Eagles loss, but they have looked pretty good lately. Of course, none of that matters until the playoffs for this team.
  • Goddamn I hate the Broncos. They’ve won 10 in a row with victories over Dallas (thank you), Houston, and obviously us. I still don’t believe in them even if the defense is legit. That being said, we need them to win. A Green Bay loss brings them closer to the Eagles on the off chance that that matters for potential wild card purposes. The Eagles really only have the division path in front of them, but we are being thorough!
• Detroit Lions at Los Angeles Rams
  • The Lions desperately needed that win over Dallas last week to keep their playoff hopes alive. It’s still not looking good. They are currently a game behind SF and Chicago for the last spot. Fortunately for them, they still have a game to play against the Bears and would win the tiebreak with a win. Unfortunately for them, they have the Rams this week with a VERY depleted defense. It’s not going to be easy.
  • The Rams have Detroit and Seattle these next two weeks and the top seed in the NFC is in their sites. Since I do not think the Eagles are going to be in Wildcard contention and have the tiebreak on Detroit as it is, let’s show some solidarity in hating the Rams.
• Carolina Panthers at New Orleans Saints
  • EVERYONE is rooting for the Panthers right now. The team was so bad that their long time podcast shut down, and rightfully so. They keep winning though. They are 7-6, still not that good, but tied with the Bucs for the division. The teams still play twice more to end the season though. What a ride. Blowing this game would be devastating.
  • …well everyone except the teams hoping for higher draft position. The Saints won last week and completely screwed their dreams of getting the #1 pick. Well, maybe not completely. Of the 8 teams with 2 or 3 losses, only the Browns have a lower SOS than the Saints. A win takes them mostly out of the equation. More losses though and they are right back in the race with any faltering from the Giants, Raiders, and Titans.
• Tennessee Titans at San Francisco 49ers
  • The Titans screwed up their quest for the #1 pick in the draft royally last week by beating the Cleveland Browns. This is a get wrong game for them against a sound SF team that should have no trouble picking them apart. The Titans are now in an uphill battle for the top pick though due to their league high strength of schedule. If they win just one more time, they could be looking at the 8th pick. Yikes!
  • The 49ers haven’t locked up the NFC Wildcard yet, but it’s close. They have a game lead and the in-conference tie break over the Lions. This gimmie while the Lions are playing the Rams could tighten the grip even more. The strange part is that they are completely overlooked in the NFC. This was supposed to be their gap year and their QB situation is just “fine,” but they have played very consistent. We still hate them.
• Indianapolis Colts at Seattle Seahawks
  • Everything was going great for the Colts. They had the best record in the NFL, everyone was swell on their owner hanging out on the sidelines (despite it being universally loathed when Arthur Blank and Jerry Jones do it), their redemptive QB was the talk of the NFL, and they just traded for Sauce Gardner. Welp! Now they are out of the playoffs, Daniel Jones is in traction, and Phillip Rivers is their QB!!! Eagles fans thought we had it bad, but the Colts had just about the worst last 5 weeks possible.
  • Oh man, you have to feel for Phillip Rivers. He comes out of retirement and has to play the Seattle defense. They have a chance to ruin his life. Although, for a guy with several dozen children who decided he’d rather travel across the country to get killed than be home anymore, what was he really clinging to? In general, we want all NFC teams to lose, my hopes for the #1 seed are dashed so I am simply rooting against the Rams now. Let’s hope Seattle is the one with 1 seed.

Eagles 2026 Offseason Plans

Sunday Night Football

• Minnesota Vikings at Dallas Cowboys
  • Ok, Vikings. We don’t like you and you don’t like us, but you need to win this game. Yes, I know you just lost 4 in a row and 6 out of 7, but you won last week. Hell, you didn’t even give up a point last week to Washington. Dallas is in the same division, it’s basically the same thing! C’mon, JJ McCarthy, let’s build off that 3 TD performance. We never stopped believing in you!
  • No idea what Cowboys team we are going to get week to week. Are we going to get the cocky team that looks past their bad opponent or the one that beats up on a weakling and declares themselves king? Those are the only two kinds (we aren’t counting when the superior opponent gives them the game because they are in their own head, that was a one time thing). It goes without question that Dallas needs to lose this game. An Eagles win and a Cowboys loss puts the division at 2.5 games with 3 to play. Dallas has the Chargers, Commanders, and Giants left.

Monday Night Football

• Miami Dolphins at Pittsburgh Steelers
  • It doesn’t really make any sense that the Dolphins fired their GM and kept their coach and somehow rode that to a 4-game winning streak. The previously putrid Dolphins now have the same record as the Chiefs and Ravens. Of course, they are 2 losses and 4 teams behind a playoff spot so the odds aren’t very good, but wouldn’t that be something? Thank you for giving us Jalean Phillips while you were still bad.
  • The Steelers beat the Ravens last week and found themselves back in the 4 seed. That’s all there is for these two teams, 4th seed or no playoffs. The big news for the Steelers is that JJ Watt was hospitalized this week with a lung issue. That does not sound ideal.